That's it! I'm now a Jehovah's Witness!

[fernandezh]

Disclaimer: No offense intended to the Hermes Family. (The only cool Germans I know)


Damnit! I can't believe they elected a German as pope! I am sure that bitch of an ex-wife has something to do with it. Where are the F*cking Jehovah's Witnesses when I need them. The one time I am finally ready to convert, is the one time they aren't beating down my door! :mad:


Hector

[apexpredator]

Disclaimer: No offense intended to the Hermes Family. (The only cool Germans I know)
Hector

Hector make note to self: Meet more Germans.

Dieter says: "The new Pope is German and....

[richhermes]

No one has told Apex that Hector's ex-wife psycho bitch is a Kraut.:eek:

[ROCK BOTTOM]

Disclaimer: Hardly no offense intended the Brothers Hermes.

My current psycho wife is a Kraut also. What is up with these crazy women.

Frau Bleucher! (horses whinnying) I love doing that shit to my wife or my mutt-in-law


Zz

[Steel Shootin']

Rock Bottom, your avatar is rubbing her cooter on a cuda.

[Steel Shootin']

As for the new Pope, I really don't care that he is German. However, I have to wonder why they elected some dude who is 78 years old. He looks worse than John Paul II. I hope he lives long and healthy, just seemed a little strange.

[richhermes]

As for the new Pope, I really don't care that he is German. However, I have to wonder why they elected some dude who is 78 years old. He looks worse than John Paul II. I hope he lives long and healthy, just seemed a little strange.

There was talk that they did not want another long pontificate. John Paul II was one of the youngest popes ever. I think JP I was in his upper 70's when he was voted in. Even if it was for only 33 days!


And when are those Hell Divers shirts going on sale?? That is some hot artwork!!

[Jaizzen]

Rock Bottom, your avatar is rubbing her cooter on a cuda.


Mr. Mayor,
Your Avatar has a shark stuck up her ASS! :eek: :p

Oh yeah...the pope.....I don't care where he's from. I think Hector's mad cause he's white :D

Jason

[fernandezh]

Damn skippy I'm pissed off he's white! Half the catholics in the world are minorities! How about an African? What about a South American? 256 popes in a 2,000 year history and every one of them were white. Just once, how about throwing a bone to a brown man?

2,000 years and you mean to tell me not one Mexican qualified? :D. "You a MexiCAN? or a MexiCAN'T"

Hector :(

[richhermes]

Just once, how about throwing a bone to a brown man?

Hector :(

Taken out of context, people would start wondering about you Hector!

[fernandezh]

Taken out of context, people would start wondering about you Hector!

You White Bastard :D I've got a barefoot and 9 month pregnant belly walking around my house that proves this brown man don't wan't no bone anywhere near him. :D

[richhermes]

Hey Brownie, ya going to the meeting tomorrow??

[inletsurf]

Have you noticed that he's the 265th pope. Do the math...since the point marked as the beginning of Christianity (0 AD) 2005/265 = 7.6 yrs per pope. Every 7.6 years per pope? 78 yrs old + 7.6 puts him at about 86 until they expect to get a new one. JPII's (not JRII...they still reign the grounds ;)) reign was rather long. Basically my take on the whole thing is that Pope Benedict XVI has some pretty big shoes to fill. He's obviously a very intelligent and well versed man, but JPII was well loved as the people's leader and a brilliant man as well.

[Jaizzen]

I'm not Catholic...or any religon for that matter but this guy looks a little shady!

Jason

[Speargun]

You White Bastard :D I've got a barefoot and 9 month pregnant belly walking around my house that proves this brown man don't wan't no bone anywhere near him. :D
http://spearboard.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=5447

[Speargun]

You know these pics are going to haunt you for the rest of your life, right?
:D :D :D

[ROCK BOTTOM]

Who's the gay dude with no shirt? :p :eek: :p

[Marcus]

Damn skippy I'm pissed off he's white! Half the catholics in the world are minorities! How about an African? What about a South American? 256 popes in a 2,000 year history and every one of them were white. Just once, how about throwing a bone to a brown man?

2,000 years and you mean to tell me not one Mexican qualified? :D. "You a MexiCAN? or a MexiCAN'T"

Hector :(

He he he... A Pope wearin' a Sombrero. :D

[Wayward Son]

Ya know, I've been told that jehova's witnesses don't believe in hunting. Dunno if that's true, but it's what I've been told. All I really know about them is that my brother will invite them in & once he gets started they try hard to leave, and when I happen to answer my door with a 7 1/2 inch barreled 44 magnum in my hand, they seem pretty happy to set a new record. For leaving :D

But the hunting thing might be the deal breaker for you, if they're not going to accept you impaling water critters.

[rigdvr]

He looks a little like the emporer in star wars!?! Minus the lightening bolts out of the hand thing of course.:)

[Danimal]

All I really know about them is that my brother will invite them in & once he gets started they try hard to leave, and when I happen to answer my door with a 7 1/2 inch barreled 44 magnum in my hand, they seem pretty happy to set a new record. For leaving :D.

Hell, I just meet them at the door, buck naked, with a bottle of ketchup poured over my head. They don't usually want to chat at that point!

[biggsy]

Ya know, I've been told that jehova's witnesses don't believe in hunting. Dunno if that's true, but it's what I've been told.

Don't know where you heard that from, but that is false. Now if you said birthday celebrations and most every holiday, you would have something, but hunting is alright.

[Spearchucker]

Biggsy - you a Jehova???

[biggsy]

No I am not, I was raised one however.

Actually, spearchucker, you should have asked me if I was a Jehovah's Witness. You just asked me if I was "God." ;)

Are you a Born Again Christian? :)

[fernandezh]

Rich: Yeah I'll be there.

Speargun: That photo proves that God is out to get me. :D

[Peter R.]

However, I have to wonder why they elected some dude who is 78 years old. He looks worse than John Paul II. I hope he lives long and healthy, just seemed a little strange.The shortest term thinking the Catholic Church engages in is decades... their plans are more often conceived for centuries.:eek:
They picked him as a stellar, experienced (he won't need a learning curve) transitional term pope... knowing full well he could live/serve for a decade. From what I've read he's a very healthy 78.

Peter's Trivia for The Day: I believe Van Morrison was raised a Jehovah's Witness. :)

[Steel Shootin']

I always found it funny that a Jehovah's Witness wanted to save me, and then when I make it clear that I will not talk to them, they want to leave me materials (The Lighthouse?), for a mere 15 cents. What is up with that? I am worth saving, but only if I give them a dime and a nickel. Great religion: Work Saturdays, annoy people by invading their privacy, deprive your kids of Christmas, Birthdays and other holidays, and believe that only your sect is going to heaven.

Hector, I do not think you would make it as a Jehovah's Witness, but if you do convert, I will not slam the door in your face (although I will ridicule you and take photos of you holding a stack of The Lighthouse, and post them on Spearboard:D)

[Steel Shootin']

By the way, on the subject of the election of a pope (via the Conclave), if any of you guys are into reading fiction, I strongly recommend Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. It is a terrific read. Brown is better known for writing The Da Vinci Code, but Angels and Demons is just a great read about the suspected resurgence of The Illuminati trying to infiltrate the Catholic Churce during the Holy Conclave. Although Brown writes fiction, he limits the fiction to only the underlying plot, so 90% of the book is all facts (and thus very educational). For example, in this book, you learn a wealth of information about the Catholic Churce, Vatican City and the history of the Conclave. As an aside, the way Brown intertwines fact and fiction has some religious leaders quite pissed off, denouncing Brown (and especially the Da Vinci Code), as misleading and "dangerous." Hogwash. If the reader is too stupid too draw the line between fact and fiction, then they are dangerous only to themselves. Besides, isn't "fact vs. fiction" when dealing with religion subjective anyway?

Angels and Demons (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0743486226/qid=1113989830/sr=8-2/ref=pd_csp_2/002-9983118-8268835?v=glance&s=books&n=507846)

[richhermes]

I always found it funny that a Jehovah's Witness wanted to save me, and then when I make it clear that I will not talk to them, they want to leave me materials (The Lighthouse?), for a mere 15 cents. What is up with that? I am worth saving, but only if I give them a dime and a nickel. Great religion: Work Saturdays, annoy people by invading their privacy, deprive your kids of Christmas, Birthdays and other holidays, and believe that only your sect is going to heaven.

Hector, I do not think you would make it as a Jehovah's Witness, but if you do convert, I will not slam the door in your face (although I will ridicule you and take photos of you holding a stack of The Lighthouse, and post them on Spearboard:D)

I think this is where the confusion is.
I have confused a Jehovah's Witness with Mormons more than once. I have never had a JW come to my door, but I HAVE had a Mormon come to my door. It's mostly been those guys wearing the white shirts and black pants riding bikes around town that have come knocking on my door trying to save me. (I used to live downstairs from a Mormon elder. They do make good neighbors.)

The Mormons have a "Lighthouse" ministry and and Jehovah's Witness' have a publication called the "Watchtower"

You know what is real fun?
Spearchucker and I were sitting around drinking beer and watching TV at the Hermes Tavernier Summer Home. We see the Mormon commercial that offers to have a free bible personally delivered. F94Gator was not there in the Keys with us, so we determined that he needed to be "saved". We called the 800 number and signed him up.
Have you converted yet, Paul?:D

[bgbill]

No I am not, I was raised one however.

Actually, spearchucker, you should have asked me if I was a Jehovah's Witness. You just asked me if I was "God." ;)

Are you a Born Again Christian? :)


John,

Is that why you can't go to the WCC #1, the saturday conflicts with your witness? :D

Maybe you could explain the deal about 144,000 people going to heaven, I always figured if the place was full already, why recruit new people?

It seems to me someone would be losing their spot once you get a new member.

[Spearchucker]

Yeah, born again :rolleyes:

You obviously do not know me.....:)

[Steel Shootin']

Good point, Rich. The Watchtower is the JH, and I get the two mixed up. In a way, you have to respect them. I guess they are doing what they believe the Lord's work is, and it is a tough gig getting one door after another slammed in your face. I have known a couple of Mormons in my life and they have been the nicest people you can imagine meeting. I just don't want them showing up at my door on Saturday uninvited.

[NutzWet]

I have never been approached on saturday moring by Mormans, but I have known many, especially in the Army at DLI (Defense Language Institute...) I have never met a Morman I did not like or respect. I could never live like that but give them props for self control... Seriously, some of the nicest and good hearted people I have ever met.

I was baptized Catholic while living in Spain. I loved it! We would have a Mass/Eucarestia and communion on saturday nights then go out to the clubs and get hammered and chase women and not have to get up early Sunday morning...... That is my kind of religion...

[fernandezh]

This German dude is the Anti-Christ and The Evil Emperor of Star Wars all Rolled into one. Here is the Proof.

[ScottZeagle]

Note to God:

I know I have done some unholy things in my lifetime, and said some pretty ugly things. However, please note that I took NO PART in the "Pope Thread" on Spearboard.com.

Thanks,

Scott

:D

[WreckDiver]

Note to God:

I know I have done some unholy things in my lifetime, and said some pretty ugly things. However, please note that I took NO PART in the "Pope Thread" on Spearboard.com.

Thanks,

Scott

:D



CYA huh Scott:D

[NutzWet]

GEEZ! I thought I was in the HOV lane to hell... but I think you just caught the Concord Express!!!

Just because he does not wear a blue bandana or a hair net and have a tat on his neck that says "LA RAZA", does not mean he is not going to be a good Papa... :P

He just needs a Rembrandt 2 Hour Whitening Kit and he will be just fine.

[f94gator]

You know what is real fun?
Spearchucker and I were sitting around drinking beer and watching TV at the Hermes Tavernier Summer Home. We see the Mormon commercial that offers to have a free bible personally delivered. F94Gator was not there in the Keys with us, so we determined that he needed to be "saved". We called the 800 number and signed him up.
Have you converted yet, Paul?:D

Yeah, those f*ckers showed up on my doorstep, too!!!

Here's something that will piss Hector off - apparently our new pope was in the Hitler youth as a child. Now sure, they forced ALL the kids to be in the Hitler youth, but I still find it kinda funny!