On aviators

[Bill McIntyre]

Aviators come from a secret society formed around a thousand years ago. They are warriors, and below is the proof.

A little known fact is the origin of the word "aviator". In the immortal words of Johnny Carson: "I did not know that." Phu Khen (pronounced Foo Ken), 1169-??? is considered by some to be the most under-recognized military officer in history. Many have never heard of his contributions to modern military warfare. The mission of this secret society is to bring honor to the name of Phu Khen.

A Khen was a subordinate to a Khan in the military structure of the Mongol hordes. Khan is Turkish for leader. Most know of the great Genghis Khan, but little has been written of his chain of command.

Khen is also of Turkish origin, although there is not a word in English that adequately conveys the meaning. Roughly translated, it means " One who will do the impossible while appearing unprepared and complaining constantly." Phu Khen was one of ten Khens that headed the divisions, or groups of hordes as they were known, of the Mongol Army serving under Genghis Khan. His abilities came to light during the Mongols' raids on the Turkistan city of Bohicaroo . Bohicans were fierce warriors and the city was well fortified. The entire city was protected by huge walls and the hordes were at a standoff with the Bohicans. Bohicaroo was well stocked and it would have been difficult to wait them out. Genghis Khan assembled his Khens and ordered each of them to develop a plan for penetrating the defenses of Bohicaroo.

Operation Achieve Victory, "AV", was born. All 10 divisions of Khens submitted their plan. After reviewing AV plans 1 through 7 and finding them unworkable or ridiculous, Genghis Khan was understandably upset.

It was with much perspiration that Phu Khen submitted his idea, which came to be known as AV 8. Upon seeing AV 8, Genghis was convinced this was the perfect plan and gave immediate approval. The plan was beautifully simple. Phu Khen would arm his hordes to the teeth, load them into catapults and hurl them over the wall. The losses were expected to be high, but hey, hordes were cheap. Those that survived the flight would engage the enemy in combat. Those that did not? Well, surely their flailing bodies would cause some damage. The plan worked and the Bohicans were defeated. From that day on, whenever the Mongol Army encountered an insurmountable enemy, Genghis Khan would give the order "Send some of the Phu Khen AV 8ers."

This is believed, though not by anyone outside our secret society, to be the true origin of the word Aviator.
Phu Khen's AV8ers were understandably an unruly mob, not likely to be sociably acceptable. Many were heavy drinkers and insomniacs. However, when nothing else would do, you could always count on an AV8er. A Phu Khen Aviator. Denied, perhaps rightfully so, his place in history, Phu Khen has been, nonetheless, immortalized in prose.

You hear mystical references, often hushed whispers, of "those Phu Khen Aviators." Do not let these things bother you. As with any secret society, we go largely misunderstood, prohibited by our apathy from explaining ourselves.

You are expected to always live down to the reputation of the Phu Khen Aviator, a reputation cultivated for centuries, undaunted by scorn or ridicule, unhindered by progress. So drink up, be crude, sleep late, urinate in public and get the job done.
When others are offended, you can revel in the knowledge that YOU are a PHU KHEN AVIATOR.

[TangoMike]

Women love us and men want to be like us

[North Star]

Bill, you have WAY too much time on your hands.

[Bill McIntyre]

Originally Posted by North Star

Bill, you have WAY too much time on your hands.

Whoever wrote that thing sure had a lot of time, but when an old Marine friend sent it to me it took just a minute to cut and paste it here.

[Aaron Proffitt+]

I liked it.

[North Star]

Originally Posted by Bill McIntyre

Whoever wrote that thing sure had a lot of time, but when an old Marine friend sent it to me it took just a minute to cut and paste it here.

OK - you are off the hook this time! You hadn't attributed it to anybody, so I thought you were the author.

[Bill McIntyre]

Originally Posted by North Star

OK - you are off the hook this time! You hadn't attributed it to anybody, so I thought you were the author.

There is no way I would have the imagination to write something like that. I just pass it along.